November 2007 - The FoCuSeD™ Facilitator eNewsletter
... and Many More | Gary Rush Facilitation
Instead of a business related topic, I have chosen to share something personal while, at the same time, sending my wife an anniversary note. Enjoy.
Millie and I come from different cultures and backgrounds and, if you follow horoscopes, both the western zodiac and the Chinese zodiac tell us that our “signs” are completely incompatible. The horoscopes gave us no chance of success. We are not marriage psychologists and don’t pretend to have all the answers, but we must be doing something right, not only in our marriage, but also with our 2 sons who are best friends.
As I think back, there are five (5) behaviors that we live by that make a difference:
- We have open communication.
- We have always been consistent in how we behave.
- We keep our promises.
- We are there for each other.
- We are one – we know each others' business.
Don’t get me wrong, it’s not always roses, but I wouldn’t trade it for anything. I do have to thank my better half, though, because my life would not have been as good or as much fun without her. Thank you, Millie.
We have open communication.
In previous newsletters, I’ve written about groups going through the diverge-struggle-converge process to reach consensus. We do this every day with every decision we make. We never keep issues bottled up. We don’t have sacred subjects that we don’t discuss. We discuss religion, politics, and even sex – openly. We have always been able to say whatever is on our minds – and that includes our sons, too (they say you may not want to know what your children are up to, but, believe me, you really do). We have no secrets from each other.
We have always been consistent in how we behave.
We are not perfect, but we are always consistent. That enables us to know what is going to happen – what we can count on and how we can approach it.
We keep our promises.
We make promises to each other and keep them. If we didn’t, how can we count on each other? This builds trust – we trust each other.
We are there for each other.
We have been there for our families, our sons, and they have always been there for us. No matter what we believe, family is first and we do whatever it takes to be there for them.
We are one – we know each others' business.
Millie and I don’t have separate lives. We enjoy the same activities. Our finances, we do together. We decide by consensus – always. We know what’s going on in each others' life. Even with our sons, we know their business and they know ours. Why not? We are family.
And so…
Sometimes people forget that the lessons we learn in life also apply at home and at work.
Thank you, Millie, for 29 wonderful years. Happy Anniversary. I love you very much! 